Heaven's Open Arms - written by Donna Rhodenizer and Andy Duinker
Written in tribute for the families of those who perished in the crash of Swissair Flight 111
September 2, 1998

Composers' Notes
Donna writes:

Swissair Flight 111 crashed off the coast of Nova Scotia near a very famous tourist location for this province. All passengers and crew on board perished. This loss of life, its suddenness, and the tragedy of it all was immense and somehow was felt even more keenly in a small province known for its hospitality and where family and neighbors are such an important part of everyday life.

A short time after the Flight 111 crash occurred, Andy and a friend were watching their kids play basketball. The friend said, "Someone needs to write a song about this tragedy. YOU need to write a song about this." Andy was coming to a practice at my house later that evening and mentioned this conversation to me. We talked about the fact that whatever song was written needed to be written without capitalizing on the grief and the tragedy of the situation. It needed to be tasteful and it needed to address the feelings of those who had suffered this great loss of their loved ones. In the past we had been successful writing songs for specific events and we felt we had the necessary skills to do this. We sat with paper and pens and started to write down ideas but words didn't seem to be enough to capture the enormity of the situation. We wanted to be respectful and supportive to those who were grieving. How could we address the variety of religious beliefs surrounding death? How could we write words of comfort for those who did not share common beliefs? What could we possibly say that would bring any comfort at all? We ceased our efforts and turned to other things.

In December I had the occasion to be recuperating from pleurisy and I was at my parents' house to rest and be cared for. In the four-months between the September 2nd crash and December, the media had been filled with reports on the crash: How the families of the victims had arrived in Nova Scotia and were taken in by complete strangers in the little community of Peggy's Cove; how volunteers and rescue workers had worked and continued to work at clean up operations; how the difficult process of identifying remains was ongoing; how people from around the world discovered that this small Canadian province had people with large and giving hearts. Stories were presented to the public about the lives of those people who had perished. We faced the fragility of life and became more aware of how precious our loved ones are to us.

All these things accumulated over four months, both consciously and unconsciously. I sat down to read the newspaper and my eye caught a small two-inch news capsule about the crash. I didn't even read it. My thoughts immediately went to the fact that here we were still grieving this terrible loss months after the fact. This was something that people were struggling to understand, to put into perspective and to deal with as every day life continued on around us. I thought about how hard it must have been to be on that plane. To know that it was going to crash. The awful reality of leaving loved ones behind with no way of ever saying goodbye or saying," I love you" one last time. I got up and went to my piano and started to play a very slow and simple melody. I played it over and over and it felt like it was a kind of prayer. What would one pray in such a situation? The words came like a simple child's bedtime prayer,

"When I die, may I fly straight to heaven's arms.
There may I rest safe from harm.

"When I die, may I fly straight to heaven's arms.
There may I rest safe from harm.
This I pray, come what may,
those I leave would know how full my heart,
I love them so."

I had started on an incredible writing journey. I left what I had started at that point, and later I continued to work on it both on my own and together with Andy. I wrote a lot of words trying to say exactly what I wanted to convey. As I played the tune for Andy, we talked about pitch changes, phrase lengths and then we began the melding of the words into that whole framework. Many lines of my words would not fit into the melodic structure of the song. How could I say what I wanted to say, what we felt we needed to be said in fewer words without losing the meaning?

Andy and I had many discussions and spent hours trying to hone my thoughts into words that conveyed the feelings we were trying to express without being clichés or trite. We expanded the song to include a second verse and had discussions about what that verse should be about. We also wrote the "bridge", a short section that is supposed to sum up a song-a difficult thing to do in eight bars! The writing process can be complicated in some ways by co-writing, but in this case it was of great value to have another person with whom to trade thoughts and ideas and to have two perspectives.

As we figured out the words, we also had to decide how the song would be put together. It seemed that the simple prayer that became the catalyst for the song's beginnings was really in two parts and we felt that it would be fitting to have the song begin and end with the prayer sections. We took the song to a recording producer and asked for some input. He suggested that we get help arranging the song. We met with someone who said that the prayers made the song start out too slowly and then when it changed to the faster sections only to return to the prayer - well, that was not going to get radio play and it wouldn't be a commercially viable piece. We felt very strongly that the song needed to have that connection to the feeling of prayer and if it didn't have viability as a radio song, too bad. We thanked our colleagues for their suggestions and continued with our hearts and our instincts giving us our direction.

Once we got the song close to singable shape we began trying to sing it. Now we were faced with a difficult task. Andy's dad had passed away almost a year before we began writing this song. The fresh loss of Andy's dad made the words even more meaningful to him. It was difficult to sing about this loss without stirring up the same grief in himself. We sang the song many times as we crafted words and fine-tuned the shape of the music. It still remained a huge challenge to sing it in public performance. It was an emotionally draining thing for Andy to do (he sang the lead) and yet, we felt very strongly that we had a responsibility to write and perform this song. We felt that we had the gifts and the talent to write a song that would express the feelings with which we were trying to deal and somewhere in a listening audience there might be someone who was not able to express those feelings of grief, those questions, or those things that would allow them to begin the healing process. So we pressed on.

We were in the process of recording a full-length CD with a combination of Maritime, Nova Scotia folk songs, and original material. We decided to include "Heaven's Open Arms" on the recording. We also included two hymns: "Sweet Hour of Prayer" and "The Mariner's Hymn," in tribute to those who had suffered the loss of loved ones in the SwissAir tragedy. We had a projected production date close to the end of the summer and then we heard that there would be anniversary memorial services being held for the families of the crash victims. We contacted the SwissAir consulate and asked if we could send them a copy of our recording and be given permission to give a CD to each family returning to memorial services in Nova Scotia. After many phone calls and letters, permission was granted and we arrived at the consulate with our boxes of 250 CDs. We did not see any family members, we did not speak to anyone in person, but we felt it was a small thing we might be able to do for those families. They were able to take a small piece of Nova Scotia home with them. A small thing compared to the loved ones they had left behind in our keeping. The music was a way to remember the love of the people and the friends that they had made while in our province.

We attended the memorial service which was very moving. The hardest part was when they rang the bell at the time the plane had gone down. Until then there had been music, small speeches of thanks and stories of some of the people who had perished. There had been a celebration of their lives, but when that bell tolled it was silent, just as the voices of those people on that plane were suddenly silenced. We grieved with the families, we celebrated the love they had known, we quietly filed out of the area.

Two days later we received a phone call requesting an additional 100 copies of the CD. The support volunteers, emergency workers and others who had been closely involved with the crash also wanted a copy of the recording. We shipped those off to be distributed, pleased that we could contribute in this small way.

We returned home and over the next few weeks and months we began receiving emails and letters. We received obituaries, we received some photos, we received thank you letters from people who had listened to "Heaven's Open Arms" and felt comforted. They wrote to say thank you. They wrote to say that they had been unable to listen to the CD for a long time and when they finally did, they were able to gain strength from the music reminding them of the beautiful place which was the resting place of their loved ones. We read the names of the victims published in the newspaper. The names became more than names on a page, they represented people, and lives, and hopes, and dreams. And we were flooded again with the impact of this tragedy. I was glad that we had written the song before we became personally attached to any one individual or family. We were able to convey some sense of comfort through our song and we continue to marvel at how applicable it is in other tragic events that have occurred since September 2, 1998.

We have performed "Heaven's Open Arms" in our own shows as a professional trio. The song was also performed by the Acadia University Youth Choir in the spring of 1999 and again at a youth choir camp later that summer. The conductor of both these groups spent time talking with the children as the piece was rehearsed and also before it was performed. They discussed how important it was to tell those you love, "I love you". There were students in the group who were not able to sing the song with their peers. The emotional connection was too strong and they could not get beyond their feelings to be able to sing. This was handled with respect and caring by the conductors in both these performing situations. A small word of explanation was given before the Youth Choir performance, indicating the choir's hope that this would be a song, written out of tragedy, but speaking of hope and love and the good things that we take from living our lives.

We presented a workshop of music at an international music conference (International Society for Music Educators) in the summer of 1999. As we had been traveling, a tornado had hit a nearby area and had devastated a camping area. Many people who had been enjoying summer camping vacations now found themselves with trailers and vehicles destroyed and many people also died. One of the people who attended our session heard "Heaven's Open Arms" and asked for a copy of the song to use in services being held for the people who were struggling with this new crisis and loss of life. The song was not published at that point, but we gave her the rough draft copy we had been using and told her to make copies and use it however she felt it would help. Although "Heaven's Open Arms" was written from a different set of circumstances, the sentiments expressed were equally suitable for that memorial service.

"Heaven's Open Arms" was written as an expression of hope. It has already served that purpose, and it continues to do so. It is being performed at memorial services wherever people grieve the tragedy of loss and celebrate the healing power of love. It is a song that is being used where and when it has a purpose regardless of the original event that inspired its creation.

It was difficult to write. We struggled both in creating it initially and in performing it. We felt compelled to write it. It was our way of contributing to society, giving words to feelings that might assist those who had no words of their own.

We have written other songs. Some are true stories, and some are purely imaginary. Some come from personal experience, but from happier memories and events. The writing of "Heaven's Open Arms" differed from the others we have written in that it was not something that affected only us, but it was also creating a vehicle for the expression of the feelings of others. We were able to be messengers for others somehow, and the responsibility to do so with respect and gentleness was paramount in our thoughts as we were creating the song. It was not just an historical account, it was an expression of the human condition. It would seem that with each tragedy and crisis we experience, more and more we need the hope and the comfort that all life has meaning and that the love we share will see us through the darkest hour.

HEAVEN'S OPEN ARMS
Words and music by Donna Rhodenizer and Andy Duinker

When I die, may I fly
Straight to heaven's arms.
There may I rest safe from harm.

I will fly, I will fly straight to heaven's open arms
I don't want to say goodbye but I must go.
It is far too soon I know, and it leaves heartache below,
Please remember that I love you as I go.

I will fly, I will fly straight to heaven's open arms
I don't want to say goodbye but I must go.
It is far too soon I know, and it leaves heartache below,
Please remember that I love you as I go.

I will fly, I will fly straight to heaven's open arms
I don't want to say goodbye but I must go.
It is far too soon I know, and it leaves heartache below,
Please remember that I love you as I go.

I will fly, I will fly straight to heaven's open arms
I don't want to say goodbye but I must go.
It is far too soon I know, and it leaves heartache below,
Please remember that I love you as I go.

Bibliography
Track 15 on the CD: Ship of Dreams (independent recording DWA 002)
performed by SAB trio, with keyboard, guitar, cello, violin, bass, percussion
Length of song: 3:48

Published as printed octavo in SSA and SAB arrangement with piano accompaniment by Red Castle Publishing

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